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Mary or Martha?
Mary and Martha: M&Ms I had made this note as a topic for a sermon.
 M&Ms had been my favorite candy of which there are so many flavors nowadays that I decided to try to collect a package of as many kinds of M&Ms to sample their personality, their taste, their crunchiness, if relevant. You can buy them all on Amazon, which is sort of the god of shopping which can get you anything you want usually as speedily as you need it. It’s addictive if one wants to keep up with the latest. M&M flavors can be coconut peanut, coffee walnut, jalapeño chili pepper, normal walnut, caramel, white chocolate, crunchy peanut, milk chocolate, Easter Egg stye, cookies and “scream”, hot cocoa, white chocolate peppermint and the latest was hazelnut - and this is just a few of them. You can even have your face stamped on the M&Ms for a party. What happened to plain old M&Ms - those simple colorful chocolate buttons that satisfy as a hunger snack in the afternoon? It was once an easy, comfortable, chocolate joy. Now it’s become an extreme challenge and fans are asked to vote between flavors for some reason as to what is the most popular. Nothing is simple anymore when too many opinions and hands get in the picture.
I think we have taken the story of Mary and Martha to similar extremes. Do we divide ourselves into Mary’s and Martha’s - different flavors of womanhood? On the one hand are the highly active do-gooders, evangelists who won’t take “no” for an answer, and those who cannot stop going into the deepest and darkest of places to help the homeless, the prisoner, the prostitute, and the suffering. There are also those women who remove themselves from society to become nuns and holy women, who spend most of their time in silence and prayer. Some say Martha is the Peter of the pair, short tempered, practical, impulsive, while Mary is John-like, quiet, contemplative, reflective, calm, and prayer-powdered.
Mary and her sister Martha gave different styles of service to the Lord. Mary sat close to Jesus to hear his words, while Martha tried to get things in order in the house, cooking a meal for the guest, cleaning up, trying not to be embarrassed when such an important friend showed up at the door and the place was a mess. Jesus pointed out that it’s not the bread of life that is more important, but the words of God which we must know, learn, follow, because those words have eternal implications. It sort of suggests the spiritual over the material, absorbing the vitamins of the soul, rather than the vitamins that make our bodies work.
Jesus chided Martha because she worried about mundane things, while Mary had chosen the better lifestyle - catching up on what Jesus had to say before His life was over. It was extremely rare for a woman to invite a man into her home, but Martha had no reluctance even as she worried about their brother Lazarus’s death when Jesus didn’t appear immediately. She ran out to find him and encouraged him to get on down to their house. Mary, though, stayed at home and mourned. Immediately, when Jesus arrived, she fell at his feet weeping.
I don’t think busy-ness or bustling about meant less attention was given to Jesus, which critics like to assume in their analysis of this story about Mary and Martha. I pray all the time if not more than the norm when I’m driving a car to some activity, and before I enter a prison and when I come out of that prison as well as when praying for the boys inside the prison. I pray most of the night when it is a sleepless one. I work out things with God in the night or strolling along a beach or even the parking lot where I walk. It’s a one-way conversation but I’m exercising the privilege we must constantly pray. And always, if at a meal we share a glass of wine, or even lemonade, we give a toast to Jesus, to thank Him.
A true Christian always has God in his or her heart and mind, is never afraid to speak to or about God at any time or place - we don’t have to kneel to talk to God - and this is how we get fearless compassion, that hope, that stamina to go where too many won’t go. In this day and time when we are so diverted by so many things creative, intense, complicated, digital, keeping up with the news, the coronavirus, we seem to not have time to sit in peace and meditate.
Now here we meet an answer. Mindful style or transcendental meditation. Contemplative moments in the modern life when we stop and read a Richard Rohr script. And it is OK to be a Christian and meditate. My “Mantra” if you want to call it that, is the name “Jesus.” Meditation makes one take a deep breath and let garbage, pain and worry squeeze out of the mind. You learn to not dwell on the past or the future but the now, without judgment. And it is healthy for the soul, and it makes us more aware of sights, sounds, smell, breath and not to be judgmental of others. Take a deep inhale, get comfortable and be quiet. Not easy for me. But we do-ers must try. And Jesus usually whispers a comforting word or idea in our busy heads.
Do these things not to win something, to gain something, to learn something, but, for me, it’s a time to be at peace, short as it is, 10-20 minutes max is the norm. And it is the perfect time to forget all else around us, if possible. Put aside the coffee or teacup. Turn off the TV, the music, and the cell phone. Some do it twice a day. Don’t worry about the quality of each meditation experience was it a good or a distracted one. it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t even matter if you are a Mary or a Martha, an M or M. It’s the emptying of the busy mind, the silence, the peace, the time without judgment or anger. The time to focus on Jesus and the Holy Spirit and put aside worries because those are temporary. This is what Jesus was talking about. You don’t owe anyone anything. Don’t have to bake those cookies to be able to love and be with Jesus. Just sit in a chair, be quiet. realize where you are and that you are alive - and be thankful to God Almighty for his son Jesus and the Holy Spirit who are always in us and with us.
There are lots of us strong powerful Martha’s today, but in a different more positive way. We are the activists that leap in to do things our mothers never did - like picking up a broom to sweep the floors, clean the kitchen, prepare food for someone, trying to be useful, sharing and working to make people comfortable and giving them hope that things will get better, and the Martha’s would have there and not let them down. Even when I go to some event or someone’s else’s home, I’m picking up dirty glasses, restocking the chip and dip, cleaning the floors and when the party is done, leaving the hostess’ kitchen immaculate. I think it is because I feel insecure in crowds and rather be useful than just standing around chatting.
Mary, on the other hand, was a more holy and sacred type - who was mostly on her knees in prayer, asking God to help and heal and love and bless all those suffering or in need. When Jesus, or today’s Bishops or Cardinals, speak, these women are all heart and ears and listen while kneeling or sitting in peace with comfortably crossed legs, even sometimes yoga style on the floor or on a pillow puff. They are admirable because they give up all accessories and activities to pray, to study, to worship the Lord, serving the poor, the hungry, the needy, those sick or mentally ill or wounded or dying in hospitals. Mother Teresa of Calcutta, now honored as a Saint by Pope Francis, is the ideal M&M model in this gigantic world of need, of hunger, poverty, and sickness. All that she did was to help the starving, abused, ill, hopeless people of God.
I’ve kind of exaggerated these two spiritual women - two of the rare women of the New Testament we can know something about and their relationship with Jesus. We know they were sisters of Jesus’s friend Lazarus. That they knew and loved the Lord and counted on him to be present when they needed help, prayer, resolve, blessings. If there was one place Jesus could lay his head, it was at the home of Mary and Martha, which was just over a hill not far from but on the road to Jerusalem. And I’m sure Jesus was always welcomed with a healthy, filling meal and a place to relax and feel safe.
~ Rev
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audrey@audreytaylorgonzalez.com
www.audreytaylorgonzalez.com
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